Naturally Fierce Feature: Sahnia

April 3, 2014

My name is Sahnia (pronounced Sonya) Oates, and I am from Charlotte, NC. I live in Belmont, right outside of Charlotte. Been back since 2007. I graduated from NC A&T and moved to VA for about 4 years. I am a wife of 9 years and have two BEAUTIFUL boys, Mason-7 and Pierce-3 (will turn 8 and 4 this year). Have a MBA in Business Administration with concentrations in Global Management and Human Resource Management. I was laid off last year and currently contracting with a company here in Charlotte.

In my spare time, (what spare time), I work out 4 days a week, alternate taking my boys to soccer or football practice, depending upon the season, or crocheting/knitting. And now I am a mentor for Tri It for Life (group of women who are doing completing a sprint triathlon (I completed one last year). Their training is 5 days a week (with all of these workouts, one would think I’d have a banging body..but alas, I do not)

How long have you been natural?

This is a difficult question to answer. Do you take the date that you stopped putting the “creamy crack” in your hair? Or is it the date that all of the “relaxed” hair was cut off? So I’d wanted to “go natural” for quite some time, but was too scared. I found out I was pregnant with Pierce in October of 2009, and I used to wash my hair in the kitchen sink. For those who have been pregnant multiple times know that after the first pregnancy, you get bigger quicker. So I went to my hairdresser and told her to “deal with it”. So I would get my hair straightened once a week. I didn’t cut the relaxed ends of my hair until February of 2011. So, for those hair natzi’s who say that you aren’t fully natural until the ends are gone, I’ve been natural for 3 years. For those that say its the date that you stopped putting the lye in your hair, I’ve been natural for 5 years.

What motivated you to transition? Were you a transitioner or a Big Chopper& why?

I guess I should have read all of the questions first before answering them. #2 basically answered this question. I think the bottom line reason I went natural? My sissy. She always had short hair (except for my wedding and I still don’t understand that, but I digress). But she would go from relaxed to straight and her curl pattern never changed. And I think I wanted a change. I wasn’t bold or daring enough to just chop all of my hair off, so I did what felt comfortable to me.

I am sticking with this natural thing is because my hair looks just as good now when I straighten it, as it did when it was relaxed. My hair is much more versatile now than it was with the relaxer, so why should I go back?

How would you describe your hair?

My hair…we have a love/hate hate/love relationship. I think I love to hate it most days. You see…I’m not really a girly girl. I don’t know how to do different styles, I don’t like to try styles. I mean..I want to try different styles, but then I don’t. I see all these different styles and like….ooooo, those are NICE! Wish I could do that…and then immediately think..oh well, on to watching something else on tv.

What do you love most about your hair?

For the most part I love my curl pattern and the color. I do have highlights, but they have grown out. Probably going to get some more. But I say I like my curl pattern for the most part because the majority of my hair IS one curl pattern. BUT, I do have some looser curls that I have to adjust my normal routine for. It can be a bit much at times, but for the most part its ok.

What has been the most memorable part of your journey? Has it been easy or difficult or both?!

I was at a natural hair convention in Durham – NuSol, and was stopped by several people to discuss my hair. Which is fine, I dont mind. But one particular person asked me the products I used and I told her. She then went on to ask me if I felt like I was a true natural because my products werent all natural. LISTEN….there is NO LYE in my head…therefore, I AM NATURAL! Some people’s hair does not work well with products…mine is one of them. I have not found an all natural product that my hair reacts with that I like. It is that simple. I may need those extra additives/alcohol, whatever. But my hair is VERY thick AND course AND dry. So all these natural products (again, that I have tried), are not thick enough to penetrate my hair shaft and make my hair look and feel the way I want to. If you are one of those people who believe that a person isnt natural due to their products, don’t be rude and place that emphasis on others that don’t. You have NO idea as to whether or not they have tried it and it worked or not. Simple as that. I wasnt too happy with that person after I walked away.

It is what it is when it comes to my hair and its journey. I remember the first year I actually cut the relaxed ends off, I didnt get a trim for 9-10 months. When my hairdresser first cut my hair, I remember she distinctly said that there were going to be parts of my head that were never going to curl. And I always tried ways to hide that side of my hair during the beginning stages. Then I just got tired of trying to hide it or it have it hanging to one side, so I just took scissors to it and chipped it off myself. I think that was the most memorable. The fact that I cut my own hair! I hadnt done that since I was in the 3/4th grade and some friends dared me to cut some bangs (needless to say my mama wasnt happy with me!!)

Another memorable part is the mixed reviews that I have received from the females in my family. Now, remember I said my sister used to flip between relaxed and natural…so they were used to it with her. But when I cut MY long hair off, well, not that, but started wearing it curly? You would think that I’d set something on fire! My mother HATED it! But then would turn around and ask me what products I used on my hair because she wanted to try it. Needless to say, she is still using the lye. But my grandmother, as soon as she saw (and still to this day see’s me) declares that she doesnt like my hair. “You know how I like your hair…STRAIGHT!” (this from the person who I got my curls from…she has NEVER had a relaxer a day in her life, but she doesnt like my hair….smh!)

Also, how supportive my husband has been during the entire process. He didnt like the in-between stage though…but even when I had a relaxer and was growing it out, he didnt like that stage. Now he just wants me to wear afro puffs for him (I still havent done that yet)

What were some of your favorite transitioning hairstyle?

When I transitioned, I wore it straight. Again, I’m not a girly girl, so I didn’t experiment a whole lot. It wasnt even until last year Easter that I even learned how to do a twist out that I liked. Before that, my sister was doing them for me. But I quickly taught myself because….here is a grown woman that doesnt even know how to do their own head? Not happening!

What is your hair regimen (including fav products)?

My absolutely FAVORITE wash n go product? Talia Waajid Curly Curl Cream!!!! absolutely LOVE that stuff!!!

My absolutely FAVORITE leave in conditioners? Giovanni (right now olive oil and avocado products) AND Eden bodyworks leave is…I use both

Deep conditioner – giovanni olive oil and avocado, although I just purchased the Honey Miravle Hair masque from Thank God I’m Natural

Oil – I have grape seed and apricot oil mized with glucose in a spray bottle

Twist outs – right now I am using Eden bodyworks Pudding Soufle…

I will pretty much try ANY product..but the only staple for me is the Talia Waajid..nothing else (as of now) works on my wash n go’s.

What are some of your favorite natural hair websites,YouTuber’s, or blogs?

I am not a you tube person…I actually hate you tube in general. I normally get my inspirations (oddly enough) from Instagram. I follow “tons” of naturals on IG.

Anything you want the readers to know? Inspirational words?

Stick with it, no matter what. Don’t listen to the folks that say “some people shouldnt be natural” SHUT UP! Anyone can do it. It is up to you to find the product and style that YOU like to get the results that YOU want. It is trial and error. No, your hair will not look like mine…because it isnt. You have your own hair pattern that works for you. And even if folks think my hair looks good…even I still get hair envy when looking at others! I LOVE looking at other natural’s hair! LOVE IT!

So my hair still isnt where I eventually want it to be. I have a couple of GREAT hair days in between my mediocre days, and I am ok with that.

Where can people find you for more information?

This is tricky…I am private on both Facebook and Instagram…and I am giving up all social media for lent. So, for those who try to friend me on facebook (Sahnia DH Oates) or on Instagram (justsahnia), don’t think that I am ignoring you. I just wont be back on until Easter. AND, for those who do want to follow me, dont expect ALL of my pictures to be just about hair. I have kids whom I LOVE showing off, and I excersize a lot, and I like food. So just look at the pictures that you want to and leave a comment or not, but realize that “I am not my hair”